It's not easy looking or feeling romantic after a long day of working, cleaning, teaching, cooking, driving, talking, and whatever else your day requires of you.
The "I have a headache" trick is old and instead of using that tired phrase, I usually just sigh and repeat how tired I am several hours before bedtime. LOL
Does this help? No, hubby thinks a little romper room is just what the doctor ordered.
For many years, I would go into the bathroom and pray for the desire to don the sex machine hat, and after several years the prayer has been answered. Actually, I don't know if my peri-menopause is to credit or the answered prayers - maybe a combination of the two. No, I still don't feel like having sex everyday, but the desire has improved a LOT over the years.
Initiating sex was a big problem in our marriage. It took a while to realize men want to feel desired and wanted just as a women, but gooood grief...give me a break! After I've done all I know to do in being a half way decent help mate to hubby throughout the day, he STILL wants me to initiate sex? NOW we have a problem (lol). Needless to say, we've worked through this also.
It's a fact, a man's sexual appetite is usually stronger than a woman's, so we need to do whatever it takes (mentally and physically) to keep our men satisfied.
I'm sure you've heard the saying, "If you don't do it, someone else will." Unfortunately, our men deal with temptation every day in ways we'll never understand, so take an aspirin for the headache and take care of your business!