I'm completely confused at the number of women I know who stay in marriages where they don't feel loved and aren't respected. Some are being controlled and think they're doing the right thing by "obeying" and following orders from the "head" of their household.
What happened to self worth and self respect? Why do women feel they have to stay in these marriages? Is it because they fear being alone? Because of the children? Lack of finances to leave the marriage? Maybe it's fear - fear of leaving a comfortable lifestyle.
A woman should never forget that not only is she a human being, but she is a human being who deserves to be respected. We may not be able to make another person appreciate us, but maybe if a woman appreciated herself FIRST, others would learn to appreciate her. Think about it..another person will only disrespect you if you allow them to.
Respect yourself enough to stand up for yourself!
What a Wife Isn't...
Ladies, don't get it twisted. Being a wife doesn't mean being a slave. Being a helpmate, helpmeet, or however you want to say it doesn't mean being at your husband's beckoned call. Serving him doesn't mean washing and ironing his clothes, cooking his dinner, washing the bathtub behind him, or cleaning the toilet behind him. Submission doesn't mean taking orders. You too, should receive the very things you give. Marriage is about serving each other, respecting each other, honoring each other, LOVING each other. A one-sided marriage is not balanced. Both spouses must be married and committed to the union...not just one spouse.
LOVE DOESN'T HURT
She mentioned that he expects her to be the perfect woman. While she sniffled and apologized for her performance, I waited for him to apologize for his verbal abuse, but that part must have been edited out. All I heard him say was, “It’s okay.” Another part that must have been edited was her response to his ugly words; her lips never parted to correct him – never. Ladies, we are daughters of a King, which makes us royalty. Those of us who are married, we are gifts to our groom.
Our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and we weren’t created to allow verbal, mental, emotional, or physical abuse to or against our temple. LOVE DOESN’T HURT. For various reasons, the holidays increase all types of abuse, so please be aware of this. The couple from The Amazing Race was in a stressful situation and of course tempers flare and we act out of character (or maybe true character) during stressful times, but there is no excuse or validation for repeated abuse.
I speak boldly about this because I’ve been there. I’ve been verbally, mentally, and even physically abused. I allowed a live-in boyfriend to repeatedly beat me. I went to another woman for counsel and she told me to stand by my man. Really? I know better now – LOVE DOESN’T HURT. Ladies, love yourself enough to protect your temple from abuse. If you need help, seek wise counsel. LOVE DOESN’T HURT.
You Don't Control Me!
I’ve been assisting a gentleman get a program off the ground
and he’s a little bossy. I think he forgets that I’m not his employee; I
volunteered to help him. I don’t like being told what to do – at all. Anyway, I
had to put this Mister in his place. You
don’t tell me what to do; you ask me. Who does he think he is – Mr. Control? I’m
sure it’s just his nature, but it doesn’t mesh with my nature at all; I have my
own control issues.
I know wives with controlling husbands or married to a man who
has taken the “leader” position to an ungodly level. No woman should be afraid
to stand up or speak up for herself. No wife should be afraid to spend money or
come and go as she pleases – within reason, of course.
I understand we need
someone to be accountable to in marriage, but who is the man being accountable
to for his spending and his going and coming?
I’m just asking! My attitude is justified. I’m aware of too many unhappy
wives who are being submissive to
raggedy husbands – husbands who are verbally or mentally abusive, controlling,
and some are cheating. Let’s not even speak of physical abuse – no excuse for
it at all. My attitude is probably why I’ve had issues in my own marriage. Only
God controls me.
Some of you may not
agree and that’s fine; but I make no apologies for speaking up when something
just doesn’t seem right, and control in marriage IS NOT RIGHT. There is a way
to treat and speak to a woman. We are precious jewels – daughters of a King,
and we deserve to be treated and talked to as such. I’m sorry, Mister, but you
don’t control me…my God does! Maybe this is the root of the problem with
submission. If husbands were led by God, wives would gladly follow!
Fixing What's Broken
Unless the light bulb is cracked and broken...you can't fix a broken light bulb!
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