In 2007 Lee switched bands but the gigs continued. I felt more relaxed because he was now with a guy from work who totally loves his wife (she and I are friends too) and the other man was a good, sweet guy. Still he appeared to be going through depression. He decided to start working out regularly at a gym and left the house at 4:30 a.m. to get it done before work. Although he was getting buffed and toned, his hair loss truly upset him. I started complimenting him regularly about his appearance, rubbed his biceps and chest...I went totally overboard trying to appease his ego, I didn't need to though, he built it up enough on his own. He started making comments about girls at work "wanting him" and how he'd catch them looking at his "package", then came the seemingly innocent comments about how all the women want to shop at "Lee-Mart." (it's okay to roll your eyes, I did) I smacked him and he laughed while saying, "Don't worry Baby, Lee-Mart is closed for business."
As if this change of behavior wasn't enough my husband asked me to consider a fantasy of his to have a threesome. I'm ashamed to say that I wanted so badly to make him happy that I considered it. I asked if he had anyone in mind and he said, "Yes." When I asked who he mentioned a woman at work I'd met one time. I was shocked he choose her because she's a somewhat butchy gal who he wouldn't look at twice had he not known her. She's a huge flirt but the wives were never worried and considered her "just one of the guys." He suggested I go out with her and the lead singer's wife, I did. I remember the car ride to Alabama to pick up the singer's wife. Lee's coworker went on and on about how her common-law husband was screwing around on her but she's okay because she was screwing around on him too. After we picked up our friend in Alabama we hit a few clubs and it was clear she wanted other men as she openly flirted with several throughout the night.
I thought the coworker was cool but I knew if I "grew a pair" and went through with the threesome that it'd only end up badly. Lee tried to push it a couple of times but when he saw I was serious he finally dropped the subject. I didn't think much more of his coworker, I didn't feel threatened at all, until the night he showed utter disrespect for me at a gig that she attended...
Mr. Rockstar Personality Rears His Ugly Head
When Lee belted out his guitar solos, Eddie Van Halen's Eruption in particular, it drove the crowd--and especially the ladies--wild. One fifty-something biker chic once told me at a gig that she called her husband to come up after my husband's solo made her "cream in her panties." I just laughed the comment off because it seemed hysterical coming from an older gal. Needless to say my husband's ego was swelling due to all of the attention.
Usually the guys stuck with drinking beer but one night mine was downing rum and cokes left and right; he was completely wasted. In attendance that night was my husband's female coworker, she was there with her best friend and boyfriend. Lee came to visit me in between sets but he also visited a lot with her. Near the end of the night my husband and his coworker were flirting and my blood began to boil. I went to get up and yank her away from Lee when my girlfriend said, "Kay, she's like that with everyone. You don't have anything to worry about. Look at her? Do you really think Lee has something for her? She's just 'one of the guys'?" I stopped in my tracks but after watching it continue for a few minutes I pulled Lee aside and told him, "Keep your hands off of her. I'm your wife! And if she touches you or you her again there will be a scene." I stood there, frozen, as Lee walked over and put his arm on her shoulder. Call it shock if you will but I couldn't muster the strength to make a scene. As soon as he wandered away from his coworker I gave him a dirty look and with wifely authority exclaimed, "We're leaving. Now!"
Lee refused to give me the car keys at first. I was so upset over his drunken state that I argued with him about who should be driving. He angrily and reluctantly pulled to the side of the road and threw the keys at me--then he walked off into the night. I called the lead singer and he and his wife tried searching for him, as did I. We all tried calling his cellphone and couldn't reach him. It wasn't until a few hours later that we learned he was sleeping on a park bench just around the corner from our home. Neither of us went to bed after he came in the door at 8 a.m., we argued heavily the whole day. His actions the night before were totally disrespectful, not to mention cold and cruel. It wasn't until Monday that Lee apologized and I told him I wanted his friendship with his female coworker to end. He promised he would only speak with her on work related issues--I believed him because he appeared to be truly sorry and I excused his actions somewhat hastily because it was done while totally inebriated.
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