Pornography - Can it help? Can it hurt?

 I personally believe pornography hurts marriages, and I realize I'm probably in the minority regarding this issue. Below are some pros and cons of pornography in marriage.

Pornography in Marriage

 Cons - Reasons People Believe Pornography Hurts Marriages

  • Guilt, mistrust, and anger about pornography can tear your marriage apart.
  • Turning to pornography may cause your spouse to withdraw from your relationship because he receives instant gratification from his fantasies.
  • When your husband views porn you may feel disrespected, take it personally, and believe that you aren't enough for him. This can create a wedge in your marriage.
  • Pornography could make it difficult for your husband to see sex as a loving form of communication. As a result, pornography can decrease sexual satisfaction within your marriage.

Pros -- Reasons People Believe Pornography Does Not Hurt Marriages

  • A wife may think, "How can he say he loves me and look at this smut?" Looking at a pretty woman doesn't mean a man doesn't enjoy making love to his wife. It is an entirely different part of their lives that is separate from their marriage.
  • Some sexual experts believe a sexual relationship can be enhanced when imagination is allowed to run free.
  • If your sexual intimacy with one another is not being replaced by your husband's porn viewing, then it should not be an issue in your marriage.
  • If your husband is viewing porn, it can only hurt you if you allow it to. If you aren't insecure and have a good self-image, your husband's porn use won't hurt you.

Talk With One Another About Pornography

Discussing this issue with trust and honesty without accusing one another is the first step in dealing with pornography. Sexual therapists suggest that partners not try to censor one another's thoughts or to force one another to view offensive material.
Whether or not pornography will add to or lessen a couple's sexual enjoyment is up to each couple.

1 comment:

God's views said...

You've got a great blog and I love your frankness and openness on marriage God's way.

However, I totally disagree with a point on this post ... Looking at a pretty woman doesn't mean a man doesn't enjoy making love to his wife. It is an entirely different part of their lives that is separate from their marriage. (You may say it's not your personal view but the fact that you put it up as a pro and Con comes across strongly that you agree with these views.

God has ordained marriage to be between two people (And the two shall become one flesh) and any third party in the form of an image, video etc makes it a tripartite relationship. I believe a lot of lies have emanated from the pits of hell through "rational thinking" on masturbation. It's even scary that Christians are condoning it and coaxing it with all kinds of sugar (The masturbation links on the right hand side of your blog). For singles and married, God is very clear on his views on defiling (Violating the chastity of) our bodies which he calls the temple of the Holy spirit. 1 Cori 6;19

Also, the scripture Mat 5:28 says "But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to desire her has already committed adultery with her in his heart"...Only thinking of her means one has committed adultery, let alone pulling down one's panties and wanking to his/her image or video.

We are truly in the end times and I believe we should all read our bibles accordingly to be guided by God on his views on these grey areas.

Lastly, what would be our reaction if Jesus walked into the room while we have our fingers down there? Would we welcome him to join the party? Or cover up in shame?

These are thoughts to ponder on

God bless you and keep up the good work