Our 'Helpmate' Conversation

Hubby and I had a conversation this morning about me being his helper/helpmate, helpmeet...whatever you want to call it. I've always tried to ask hubby what he needs help with instead of trying to read his mind. I've also tried to do those 'helpmeet' duties that I've been taught to do, yet as I mentioned, I no longer agree with those teachings.

Our Conversation

Me: Kevin, you know I've been praying and studying about marriage and I'm on this helper stuff.

Kevin: Shakes head in agreement as he puts on his shoes for work.

Me: You know what? When God created Eve to help Adam, Adam didn't have clothes to pick up and wash. There was no food to prepare and cook. Isn't if funny how over the years, the helper has transformed into doing all that stuff? I put emphasis on stuff

Kevin: putting jacket on and trying to get out of the house as quickly as possible.

Me: You know what I mean? (grabbing his head to get eye contact) God isn't concerned about this worldly stuff - cooking, cleaning, and laundry. Is He?

Kevin: standing and swaying from side to side. You know what I'm doing?

Me: It looks like you're dodging bullets

Kevin: Yep, I better get ready; I might have to fight somebody. We laugh as he leaves for work

Think about it...God's ways are not our ways. His thoughts are not our thoughts. God is concerned about spiritual matters. God is concerned about our heart. I can wash all hubby's clothes and cook all his meals and still not be the helper I was created to be for him.

That stuff (that he can very well do himself) is done because I love him - not because it's my responsibility as his helper.

Helping my husband means encouraging him to be the provider, the priest, and the protector of our home.

Helping my husband means offering encouraging words when he feels the weight of being all those things is on his shoulder - not nagging him with unnecessary yip yap that I'm good at.

Helping my husband means giving him the love he needs - not the love I want to give him - this is hardest for me.

Helping my husband means keeping him in his place as leader of our home by having his back, but not doing his job. Uh...Kevin you gotta go to work, buddy!

Helping my husband means keeping him covered and lifted in a prayer that does not cease.

Helping my husband means doing my part to keep him physically satisfied. Men deal with some crazy temptations

Helping my husband means showing him how much I appreciate him choosing me to be his life companion. I really am blessed that he chose me - nobody else can handle me.

I can go on and on, but I think you get the picture. That stuff is important, but not nearly as important as helping a man be the man God created him to be - physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

Taking care of the stuff is easy, but pouring your heart into your husband's life is hard work.

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