We Don't Wear Wedding Rings

After reading Part XIII of the True Series of a Wife Discovering Adultery, hubby and I thought we'd share something about ourselves most couples frown upon. No, we aren't swingers!

We decided not to wear wedding rings about a year ago. GASP! What?!

You read it correctly, we stopped wearing wedding rings a while ago because there was so much tension when the rings came off. Hubby's job requires him to remove his ring often, which was fine with me - as long as he put it back on. One day his ring broke, and the mere mention of me purchasing another ring brought up MUCH conversation that led to me taking mine off. What was my issue with our wedding rings? Did the wedding rings add a level of trust or commitment to our marriage or were we wearing the rings for those outside our marriage?

You know what? If an object is going to cause that much confusion, get rid of it!

We are now in a place in our marriage that doesn't require an object of faithfulness or affection. It's not about what's on our finger, but about what's in our heart. Wearing or not wearing rings really isn't about trusting your spouse, but about trusting yourself.

I asked myself several questions...

  • Does a so-called symbol of matrimony define our marriage

  • Why do I feel better when hubby wears his ring?

  • Are our rings defense mechanisms from adulterous acts?

  • Do I feel differently when I don't have my ring on? Why?

  • Does my level of trust change when hubby isn't wearing his ring?

  • Why do I put so much emphasis on where his ring is? Where his heart is should be my concern!
  • Did I make my vows to God or to my rings?

Needless to say...I feel FREE without a wedding ring - FREE from the bondage of what the ring is supposed to represent. FREE from the bondage of my expectations of a tangible object.

If a wedding ring has so much power, why are there so many divorces and so much infidelity going on - even more so in the church - where the ring is supposed to be sacred? Hmmm...


Anonymous said...

My husband and I did not wear wedding rings for several years - his got bent while doing auto repairs, and I lost mine! We could never replace the original rings (finances), and I didn't want a cheap substitute, so I kept looking for years, thinking I would find it somewhere. He still doesn't wear his (it is now too small, plus bent), but I finally decided I wanted a ring - to commemorate my commitment to stay "in the ring" for 22 years! It is a reminder of an agreement between God and me. When I look at it, I think, "I stayed!"

Spirit Filled said...

I applaud you guys for not allowing the "rings" to determine your hearts. And I can only imagine the "free" feeling you have, because it's as if you have been delivered from "people". Now, I where mine because when a man steps to me...and knows that I am married, it gives me a guilt-FREE reason to be "rude" : )

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